Holiday Gifts for your Date – Big and Expensive Not Always Better

Planning ahead is always better than rushing around in search of a gift at the last minute. Yet, before you get ready to hit the stores or put a down payment on that dreamy gift, consider the depth of your relationship – meaning the length of time you two have been together – and the appropriateness of the type of gift you are considering.

"In a new relationship, a big, expensive gift will surely come as a surprise, but may also scare off your partner. On the other hand, if you’re in an established relationship, you may think you can shop at the last minute because you already have a ‘sure thing’ going, right? Wrong," explained Paul A. Falzone, relationship guru and CEO of the world’s largest dating service, The Right One and Together Dating, as well as, online dating service eLove.com.

According to Falzone, if it’s true love and meant to be, then you have plenty of time to wow your lover over the years. But, if you rush ahead with elaborate gifts in the early stages of your relationship, you stand a really good chance of scaring that special person off before you’ve even spent your first year together.

"Buying an expensive piece of jewelry or booking an extravagant trip to Paris when your relationship is still in the early stages may set off warning bells in the other’s mind. He or she begins to think it’s way too much, too soon, and he/she is right," noted Falzone.

On the flip side, couples who have an established relationship should expect a great gift from each other. That doesn’t necessarily mean increased quantity of gifts or even greater extravagance, but it does mean that their gifts to each other should be very well-thought out, especially since they know one another.

Unfortunately, the opposite happens.

Couples who have been together for a long time begin to "relax" in the gift giving department. A man will pick up the same boring bottle of perfume for his gal, just like he did last year, and a woman will select an outfit for her man that is dissimilar to his usual attire (and will probably never be worn).

"When you’ve been in a relationship for well over a year, that’s the time for jewelry and hotspot vacations," said Falzone.

So, what’s an appropriate gift for your partner in a new relationship versus an established relationship?

For those in a new relationship, look for a gift that says you’re interested and care about really getting to know the other person. This may include gifts of music he/she enjoys or items related to sports that he/she plays or something for his/her collection. Avoid clothing purchases, as it is too personal a gift when you’ve only been dating a couple months and it’s difficult to pinpoint an individual’s style.

Expensive jewelry, especially rings and watches, is also too over the top at the early stages. Men, if you’ve been in a relationship for three months, the only jewelry you can get away with giving without scaring her off is earrings. Ladies, if your relationship is still new – go with gadgets for him. There is an "electronic something" geared to every manly interest under the sun. Go beyond the electric shaver and opt for a gizmo for his laptop, iPod or even that nifty power tool he’s been eyeing.

In a long-term relationship? Now’s the time to pull out all the stops. You know what he/she likes, so go for it. Is your man a diehard pro soccer fan? Get tickets to a game – in Italy. Is your special lady’s birthday in May? An emerald (May’s birthstone) ring is fitting. Or, how about planning a romantic vacation together and let it be your gift to each other? Gifts that revolve around a person’s likings or interests are usually truly appreciated no matter how long you have been together. What if you’re in a relationship with a woman whose primary interest is clothes, shoes and bags? Then find out exactly what she wants and buy it for her.

Gifts that don’t go over well at any point in a relationship are those related to household tasks. No one really wants a vacuum as a gift. Even if it is state-of-the-art.

Catering to more than 300,000 members at over 60 locations throughout North America, The Right One, Together Dating and Elove.com are the largest bricks and mortar dating services as well as online hybrid in the industry, offering a more consistent product, a greater number of potentially compatible mates and added value of flexibility in transferring memberships to another geographic region.

Romantic Locations

The Right One’s offices and affiliates located throughout the United States include: California (San Diego); Colorado (Glendale); Florida (Miami); Georgia (Atlanta); Kansas (Wichita and Overland Park); Illinois (Downers Grove, Rockford and Bloomington); New Jersey (Cherry Hill, Hackensack); Massachusetts (Norwell, Newton, Shrewsbury and Woburn); Nebraska (Omaha and Lincoln); Pennsylvania (King of Prussia, Pittsburgh and Monroeville); Rhode Island (Warwick); Texas (Dallas, Austin); and Wisconsin (Madison, Appleton, Brookfield).

North American locations and affiliates of Together are: California (Encino, Irvine, Los Angeles, Upland); Florida (Palm Beach, Vero Beach); Georgia (Savannah); Indiana (Ft. Wayne, Indianapolis, South Bend); Kentucky (Lexington, Louisville); Louisiana (New Orleans); Maryland (Columbia, Frederick); Minnesota (Minneapolis); Nevada (Reno); New Hampshire (Hooksett, Nashua, Portsmouth and Salem); New Jersey (Bridgewater, Clark, Colts Neck and Lawrenceville); Ohio (Cincinnati); Pennsylvania (Mechanicsburg); South Carolina (Greenville); South Dakota (Sioux Falls); Texas (San Antonio, Beaumont and Houston) and Virginia (Falls Church).

For more information about Together Dating and The Right One, please visit their websites at www.therightone.com, www.togetherdating.com, and www.elove.com or call
(800) 818-DATE (3283).

(Editor note: For interviews with the colorful and articulate Paul A. Falzone, CEO of eLove, The Right One and Together Dating and the author of a recent book on the history of dating, please contact Steve Dubin, PR Works, at (781) 582-1061 or, by e-mail, at sdubin@prworkzone.com.)